Inner child therapy
Over time, I did everything in my power to "look for" myself in all possible ways, to discover myself, to treat myself and to heal my emotional wounds acquired along the way. Certainly, the most difficult path was that of identifying, accepting and healing the inner child. I realized that in order to be able to accept others as they are and stop feeling hurt by what is happening on the outside, had toă no more totry toă tochange them bută I change something about myself, to love my inner child.
"The most shadowsinour lifeă appear becauseă weă standăin tothepathof tothe light.” – Ralph Waldo Emerson
Learn everything you need to know about inner child therapy and its benefits.
About inner child therapy
Inner child therapy is a form of psychological therapy that focuses on identifying, understanding, and healing a person's emotional wounds and childhood trauma. Our inner child is a representation of us in multiple childhood moments.
The inner child is present in absolutely all our relationships (collegiality at work or school, family, friendship, etc.). Choosing to ignore your inner child's unfulfilled desires, as well as its fears, can lead to conflicted relationships, permanent states of dissatisfaction, irritability, and even chronic psychiatric pathologies. Precisely because, especially in moments of crisis, this child takes control over the adult, there is a great need to have a relationship with him, to know and heal his wounds, unfulfilled needs, and to be the adult who can fulfill them.
During the first 7 years of life we internalize the feelings of safety, love, acceptance and belonging in different ways, depending on how much and how we encountered them in the family and the environment in which we developed. Some of us have felt protected, so that in adult life we trust ourselves and can give trust to those around us. For others, the development experience was less positive, forming them as people who have difficulty trusting themselves and others, feeling unwanted and inadequate in most situations, lacking a sense of safety and support. They are people who seek refuge in a partner and a job most of the time, waiting to find fulfillment and security. In even more unfortunate situations, these people seek refuge in alcohol, drugs, gambling and promiscuous sexual behavior. These positive and less positive experiences from childhood, together with our genetic inheritance lead to the formation of a part of our personality, the "inner child".
Every being has, since birth, four fundamental needs: the need for belonging, the need for autonomy and safety, the need for satisfaction of pleasure, and the need for self-confidence and recognition. Parents have a duty to fulfill these needs to their babies, and fulfilling them helps in the emotional development of the human being. But, no parent is perfect and no childhood is perfect. So the lack of fulfillment of one or more needs can lead to the appearance of wounds that stay with us all our lives, remain in that part of us, that subpersonality of the inner child - if they are not healed.
The Cambridge Dictionary defines the inner child as: “The inner child is the part of the personality that still reacts and feels like a child.”
One of the roles of the inner child is defense. The wounded inner child doesn't want to be hurt again in adulthood, so he reacts the way he knows best: the way he knows works and the way he's learned. The point of therapy is to discover other ways of reacting that are less toxic to ourselves or even to those around us. The voice of the inner child should never be ignored. Because then that inner voice of the vulnerable part of us might become annoying, extremely sad, naughty or shut down.
- excessive politeness
- lack of assertiveness
- procrastination
- low frustration tolerance
- poor impulse control
- the need to please others
- neglecting one's own physical and mental health
- the need for fulfillment through others
- feelings of rejection and inadequacy
- persistent fear of "I can't"
- different types of addictions: alcohol, drugs, sex, work
- the inability to get out of unsatisfactory relationships
- poor emotional and mental health: depression, lack of motivation, social isolation, difficulty sleeping, avoidance/excess of sexual contact, weight gain or loss, lack of productivity and motivation at work, increased anxiety in various areas of life.
- Repetition of patterns in relationships – people with attachment wounds tend to unconsciously recreate the attachment patterns they experienced as children in their adult relationships, whether romantic or not.
- Loss of a parent or a close person
- Physical/emotional/sexual abuse/illegal substances at home
- Serious diseases
- Severe bullying - at home or in the community (kindergarten, school) - bullying
- Natural disasters
- Family separation
- Domestic violence
- Mental illness of a family member
- Refugee status
- Isolation from family
Minor trauma is common in childhood, so even the healthiest childhood does not preclude the need to work with the inner child at some point. If we went through a major trauma in childhood, the results will be seen in adulthood. Moreover, if no one helps us to heal when we are still in the child stage, it is very possible that the serious effects will follow us all our lives, until the healing of the inner child. These effects can be:
- Self-sabotage
- Self-restraint behavior
- Self-destructive behavior
- Passive-aggressive behavior
- Violent behavior
One of the essential conditions of our evolution is the ability to understand and confront our own emotions and behaviors. Both the good and the bad. Misunderstood emotions and unresolved destructive behaviors lead us to emotional problems, relationship dysfunctions, mental, emotional and even physical illnesses.
Healing the Inner Child is the process of connecting, understanding, embracing the inner child, that is, our original self, the pure form in which we entered this world. Now is the time to turn your gaze from the outside to the inside, to have the courage to look into the eyes of the wounded child still suffering inside you, to give it the love, trust and security it needs.
We cannot change the past, but we can change the perception of it as well as the present which is the basis of the future.
How will the collaboration go?
For tailored results, trust and connection are essential, so everything will start with a meeting to get to know each other and from there we will draw further steps to follow.
The consultation is an opportunity to discover your expectations regarding the session with me, as well as the history of physical, mental or spiritual discomfort states you have faced up to now.
It is a free discussion carried out by phone/online or face to face, in which we will discover together what you face or what prevents you from achieving the results you want. Then we'll decide, together, which therapies are right to help you find your balance.
The time differs from person to person, but also depending on the therapy. Some people may need longer sessions, while others may not. You will definitely benefit from all the time you need.
All therapies can be done both remotely and face-to-face. You choose what is more comfortable for you.
You can change your life today. Take control.
Does everything sound so nice? Seems too good to be true? Let's discuss more during a free consultation and convince yourself. You tell me what presses you, what holds you back, and together we start on the path of change.
